First a gigantic huge thank you to everyone that listened to the podcast and shared love in all the ways you did. It meant so much to me. A special thank you to my mastermind ladies: without you there would be no flowing. Check out these women changing the game in all the ways. Colleen from The Longest Dance is helping us all look at our role as caregivers differently, Dottie of DorothyCamak.com how she’s helping small businesses looking at social media is really awesome, Madison of Nourish and Namaste is about fueling the goodness in every ounce of you and it’s delicious, and Kristyn of Perfectible Health (if you’re on the list I’ve introduced you to Kristyn before) who is looking at stress, mindfulness and living a life you love to live.
So a few questions have come in and let me first say: I am with you, figuring this out as I go, I am no expert, my flow game is not at expert level but maybe that’s exactly the perspective you need so I’ll share my thoughts. I am 100% game to collaborate and chat more about this stuff so feel free to push the conversation forward with better questions for us ALL to answer.
I feel like if I allowed the flow, I would keep giving myself permission to not do things when they don’t feel right, but then things aren’t getting done. I’m scared that maybe its not something “i want enough”, so I should ditch the desire, but that doesn’t feel right either. Isn’t there some level of “force” in the flow way of life?
This is a great question and I hear you on the fear that you just won’t do things and that feels scary and not right too. My experience in the last month has been that I’ve done more of most of the things but there are a few things that I haven’t been doing so I went to my journal and probed around in my intuition:
- Why haven’t you been working out with weights? (that’s something that I feel like I *should* do but I haven’t been doing in the flow.) The answer: I don’t really want to.
- Why don’t you want to? The answer: Because I don’t want to feel sore and like it’s hard to just move through the world.
- Is there another way? The answer: I don’t actually know. I should ask my trainer if I should just dial the weights back and go in more gradually. Or if being sore is something temporary I need to work through.
- Why do I feel like I should do this? The answer: Because I want to feel stronger and be healthier during this pregnancy.
- What would help me want to do this? The answer: Not getting as sore and feeling like there’s a good time for me to do this for me.
- What would it look like to try? The answer: Just do one of the sets sometime today when it flows.
How do you flow with a partner that really doesn’t want to flow at all?
I had to go to George with this question because real talk? He has been modeling much better flow for the last three years and until I recognized flow I didn’t even realize it! I thought he was just “relaxed” and maybe that’s something to take note of….flow looks like the opposite of stressed.
I think there are a few simple things that can help someone else get in the flow. The question: What sounds good? While very simple does ask the important question of what would be the best next flowy move. It’s different than What do you want to do? Or What do we need to do? because there is a piece of What sounds good? that you’re not asking to be “realistic” and sometimes you need to step out of the loop you feel stuck in to see that what you actually want is more possible than you gave it credit for.
I can recognize now that I found flow after I had gotten what I deemed “important” done for the day too. So maybe start by seeing what would need to happen for a relaxing evening or afternoon? While a full life of flow would feel dreamy it’s not realistic for me right now so recognizing that sometimes I have to get in there and do the work and that time for flow is the reward helps.
I’ve got so much more to say about the Flow stuff and the thing I’ve been thinking about more than ever: What actually makes me happy if it’s not productivity? I’d love to know your thoughts on this. Head to the comments or Facebook or Instagram!